Cart Wheels

Cart designed to accomodate senior stoop.

While in Louisiana, I'm staying at a home that is 20 minutes away from the nearest super center, so the locals shop at a closer "neighborhood" grocery. A pound of bacon might be a bit more expensive there, but you save money compared to the cost of popping Prozac after grocery shopping with maniacs. I'm fine with paying a little more at this grocery. They have special carts for senior citizens. They're smaller than super center carts, making it less painful when we come barreling down the aisle and smack you young folks in the ankles. When will you people understand that we're in a hurry? Seniors live under the life clock and we must squeeze lots of life into a short time. We do this by slicing each day in half and taking a nap in the middle. That makes each day actually two days. So we're rushing to get home for our  nap so we can stay awake through Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy. Did you think it's an accident that they advertise adult diapers and reverse mortgages on Jeopardy?
These carts also make sense for senior diets. Most of us are on Ensure and veggies; how large a basket do you need? Also, you can't fit a crying kid into them. Amen to that.
Perhaps the best reason for these carts is that when  a group of us seniors decides to have a class reunion in the middle of the canned vegetable aisle, the rest of you can get around us and leave us to our discussion. We need these meetings to discuss the price of gas, the insolence of children, and  Vanna's dress on last night's Wheel of Fortune. We compare doctors, buttery spread and the ripeness of today's bananas. And by the way, when you give us the stink eye and pass us with your giant cart, acting like we're in your way, we snicker to each other that you have a big butt.