Saturday, September 29, 2012

Home Sweet Earth

Architect's Drawing Board for Club Mars
Great news! Scientists have determined that there was, for sure, water on Mars. That not only means there could be some form of life there, it presents earthlings with economic opportunity. Plans are already being made to discover where the water went and to replace it. There is now an exploration planned to search for ancient septic tanks.
Can you imagine a Mars with water? Real estate developers certainly can! I came upon an architect's plan for construction of "Club Mars," a family-oriented vacation resort that will maximize the natural features and attractions of the red planet.
The resort will include the "Mars Bar," a space- themed cocktail lounge set into a natural Martian crater. Drinks will include "the Red Planet," a plastic tube with the world's largest maraschino cherry floating in spiked Gatorade. The guestrooms will be made from salvaged space shuttles, with their "windows on the world" pointed at Earth.  Older space capsules,  fished from the ocean years ago, will be bathrooms. No need for outside plumbing; just use the tubes and gadgets already there.
Businesses are making plans to distribute their products in the Mall of Mars, a bubble-enclosed shoppers paradise.  There will be, in addition to Marswear Designer Fashions, bottled Earth
Water, "Eau de Terre," and Mars Edition Ray-Ban sunglasses. The mall arcade will have games like Earth Wars, where electronic figures will duke it out over the iPhone 17.
Some of us will not go there. We'll stay here and drink nasty earth tap water, lounge at the Motel 6 and and wear the most expensive sunglasses available at the Dollar Emporium. We like it here.

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