Spooky Saturday

"The Birds" trying to warn me

I should have known. Nothing good can happen in a small Midwest town on a gloomy Saturday in October. My husband arranged for us to meet his siblings and their spouses to divide the worldly possessions left to them by their late mother. It was cold and raining as we headed north on the country highway. We passed the Silver Send-Off Rest Home, and I pretended not to notice, but I could tell he glanced at me as we drove by. Driving through Brookville, there was an ominous flock of vultures fluttering up and down on the roof of the church tower. I took that as a sign. The Day of the Vultures.
Dividing up Grandma's possessions was awkward and slow. The participants and their kibitzing spouses took 7 hours just to get through the dishware. There was an undertone shared by all:  She loved me best, and I should have it all! I understand that, because my mother and dad clearly liked me better than my siblings. Who wouldn't.
It was a grueling procedure; cup by saucer by plate, in an auction-style presentation. "Who wants this chipped plate?" A sister-in-law asked, holding the object up in Vanna White style. In seconds a bid was made. "I remember Mama serving spam on that plate," said a brother. "Yeah, but I puked on it once," said another. My husband spoke up. "Well, I'm the one who chipped it when I dropped  my yo-yo on it." He got the chipped plate.
I was thrilled when we finally left the house and headed for a restaurant. My favorite son was treating, but he wouldn't let me take a photo of a Honey-Boo-Boo look-alike, or our waiter, who looked like President Obama. He made me put my camera away and said if I didn't behave, I'll soon be enjoying chipped beef at the Silver Send-Off Rest Home. Even though I'm a blogger and need photos I complied.
I hate chipped beef.